Emails to God – “If I perish, I perish” (Esther 4:9-17)

18 Jun

9 Hathak went back and reported to Esther what Mordecai had said. 10 Then she instructed him to say to Mordecai, 11 “All the king’s officials and the people of the royal provinces know that for any man or woman who approaches the king in the inner court without being summoned the king has but one law: that they be put to death unless the king extends the gold scepter to them and spares their lives. But thirty days have passed since I was called to go to the king.”

12 When Esther’s words were reported to Mordecai, 13 he sent back this answer: “Do not think that because you are in the king’s house you alone of all the Jews will escape. 14 For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?”

15 Then Esther sent this reply to Mordecai: 16 “Go, gather together all the Jews who are in Susa, and fast for me. Do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. I and my attendants will fast as you do. When this is done, I will go to the king, even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish.”

17 So Mordecai went away and carried out all of Esther’s instructions.

Dear God, first, Esther’s request for the Jews to fast is the closest we get in Esther to seeing someone involve you—if only by intimation. But what I really admire about this story is the last sentence of verse 16: “And if I perish, I perish.”

It kind of reminds me of my favorite verse. It’s Acts 20:24: “However, I consider my life worth nothing to me. If only I may finish the race and complete the task the Lord has given me—the task of testifying to the Gospel of God’s grace.” At some point we all need to consider our lives worth nothing to us. At some point we need to do what we know is right regardless of what it means for our comfort. I’m not saying that I do these things very well. I do consider my life when I decide moment by moment whether or not to testify to the Gospel of your grace. I do consider myself too much when I decide whether or not to confront someone who is speaking hatefully.

Father, I think of some of the heroes of the world and the selfless decisions they made. Of course, there are those in the military who have died for their country. There are parents who work hard to sacrifice and provide for their children’s futures. There are wives who sacrifice their careers for their children and husbands. There are fathers who sacrifice their careers for their children. One doesn’t have to die to show they are selfless. One has only to die to one’s selfish ambitions and desires. Help me to do this as I make decisions on what kind of husband, father, employee, leader, son, brother, and friend to be.

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Posted by on June 18, 2012 in Esther


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