What are you doing here?

27 Dec

But the Lord said to him, “What are you doing here, Elijah?” (1 Kings 19:9b)

Dear God, it’s a totally different context and set of circumstances within which I find myself right now than where Elijah was in his life, but the question came to me yesterday while I was driving to my vacation. What am I doing here? I don’t feel a particular need for a vacation. I don’t feel burned out. I don’t feel directionless. I don’t feel lost or scared. Why am I spending a couple thousand dollars this week to be here? What am I doing here?

The last time I remember feeling this question asked of me was in January 2005. That was a time of great uncertainty, and we were convinced that was going to be the year that we really focused on my wife. She was going to apply to graduate school in another state, and I was going to be willing to relocate for her benefit. 2005 was gong to be “The Year of Megan.” So I was at a men’s retreat at the beginning of January with my dad and brother-in-law, and I remember going for a jog/hike and praying about the year ahead and being willing to do whatever you wanted. In retrospect, it was a huge year for our family, but it ended up being my career for which we changed cities and moved.

So now I’m asking myself why I’m here. Honestly, I had the week off and I had no idea what I would do at home for a week. I could do some chores, but that would only take a day (and they’ll be waiting for me when I get back). The other days would just be killing time. But there is something being down at the beach at South Padre Island and that helps me to disengage and relax. And it also helps me to be away and to think. It also helps me to maybe give some attention to different writing projects that are on my heart.

So what am I doing here? Father, I think it’s just to not waste days, but to have some time to both rest, pray, and think. Pray about they year to come as it pertains to my personal world (family, work, friends, community, etc.) and the world at large. Think about what is on my heart and what might have been put there by you. And work on a couple of these projects and see if they have any traction. There just might be something there that can make a difference for your kingdom. So be with me this week. Speak to me. Give me ears to hear, eyes to see, and a mind read to respond.

In Jesus’s name I pray,


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Posted by on December 27, 2020 in 1 Kings


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